I promise an exercise related update soon…but for now here is a poem I wrote last week…
Here is the latest update from the otters… they have finally solved the hamster problem!
Don’t forget to click through and follow the Otter Chronicles to find out what they are up to on a regular basis 🙂
I have been having some fantastic chats this week with that temporal research fellow, Brian Russetcoat. Fantastic, and more than a little confusing, but he said some extremely interesting words, long ones too. He has a lot of opinions that one, and he does have a tendency to look around dramatically and go off on tangents. Still, splendid conversations I am almost certain.
Yes, I remember now, we had quite a fascinating discussion about music, this fellow used to be in a popular music combo you know. Something I remember from when I was a young otter kitten, B’lieve or somesuch thing.
This was before he got into the research game of course.
Music wasn’t the main reason for our chats, but as I think I have mentioned Brian is a tricky person to talk to. Thoroughly nice chap though, full of enthusiasm and zeal and ideas.
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I have been having a go at writing poems, I have posted them on my other Art Journal blog but I thought I’d share this one with you all.
Bernard, lived on the wrong side of the biscuit shelf, he was down on his luck and out of favour with the biscuit elite. He used to be the biscuit around town with his super chunky chocolate chips and his velvety cocoalte coating, all the girls would swoon. How, the times have changed, he is now a bad biscuit. With no hopes had he of fitting in with the wholegrain wafer thin posse of the good biscuits, Bernard enrolled in a elite military unit. When a spate of murders were reported in the local area, Bernard was sent to prison by a military court for a crime he did not commit. The court was convinced, because Bernard was a bad biscuit.
Well, that sounds like an epic tale of the battle between good (food) and evil (food), I am surprised none of the major bestselling authours wrote it…
I am not surprised at all because there is no such thing as good and bad food!!
(also, sadly, biscuits can’t join the A Team)
This may have been a rather obscure way of getting my point across but I wanted to highlight how much nonsense there is out there concerning food. There are diets which advocate cutting out entire food groups, there are billion dollar industries built around diet methods that are primarily geared around selling you products and don’t teach you healthy choices in the long run. There are detoxes and clenases and all sorts of things that in the worst cases boil down to legitamised eating disorders. I am not doing to go to far into my opinions on these diets right now, but suffice it to say that some of these things can be used sucessfully if you treat them as a short term learning exercise.
However, what I really want to talk about is societys attitude to food and the language we (yes I am guilty too although I do try not to be) use to describe foods.
How often have you heard food described as bad or unhealthy or been told that you or someone else shouldn’t eat it because they are trying to be good. Eating a biscuit has become synonymous with being naughty in society. It is almost like eating food deemed to be unhealthy has become a crime with all the associated guilt and punishment.
There is a pervasive expectation within society (women in particular but by no means only women) that you justify your chocolate/cake/bag of crisps/whatever. Listen for it next time, people say “oh I shouldn’t have this but I won’t get any lunch” or ” I have to go for a long run later” or some such thing. If they don’t do it so directly, you may hear such phrases as “Oh my goodnes that’s sweet, I am not used to that much sugar any more” implying that this is ok because it is a once in a while occurrence and they didn’t really enjoy it anyway. Or someone will shortly after eating whatever it is bring up their running or gymming or the salad they had for lunch.
We now seem to live in a society where enjoying tasty but less out right good for you is frowned upon to the extent that people are driven to feelings of guilt afterwards. People then restrict food in the next meal or day to make up for the “slip” or they punish themselves with a super hard workout…
Food has been divided into “good food” and “bad food” and the two should apparently never meet! It is all about extremes bad food will undoubtedly kill you and good food will reputedly make you live forever as a god. There is no in between!
Well this all needs to stop!
Exercise is not a punishment, if you are doing an exercise that you see as a punishment, it is not the one for you…it is a great thing to be doing for yourself so do something fun!
Withholding food is not a punishment…well actually it totally is, it is one used by sadistic prisons and concentration camps and the like. It is not a thing we should be doing to ourselves because we have been bad and eaten a biscuit.
What is even more important to realise, is that the action of eating a biscuit or cake or cheese toastie or whatever is not an action that needs punishment.
Food is not a crime. (unless you are launching it at other countries then it might be)
Food itself is not good or bad!
Food has no moral values what so ever!
It is all about moderation and balance. There are wrong amounts of foods, this means there are amounts of foods which will cause you to have taken in more energy than you expend. This is true of all foods though. The amount is different in each case but it is still true. I know it is, I worked it out, you can exceed your (average) recommended calorie intake by just eating lettuce…although it would take something like 47 lettuces a day and I don’t recommend it…
I am not saying that all foods are nutritionally equal. I am not saying that there isn’t an element of thought that should be given to what you eat. What I am saying is we need to try to take the emotion and the guilt out of the equation.
This way disordered eating lies. We are becoming a society of people with unhealthy attitudes to food and eating and all things related. A society of people frightened to eat a cake for fear of the judgement of strangers (and friends). A society locked in to a cycle of overeating and dieting and restriction that leads to more overeating.
We need to realise that it is all about balance. There is room in a balanced diet for a biscuit. There is room for a piece of cake. It just shouldn’t be all the cake all of the time…
Now if you’ll excuse me I am going to track down Bernard, he sounded tasty…
Well apparently yes…apparently I can do comedy. Who knew??
Yes I know I am breaking my new schedule the day after it started but I am excited and I want to tell you things!!
About a month ago, I entered a writing competition. It was brought to my attention by the lovely Lucy from Secret Diary of PorterGirl (whose blog is fantastic btw go and read all of it and buy her books) it was a flash comedy writing competition on the website https://carrotranch.com/
Now, I had never really written fiction before, or comedy… but I thought “what the hell, I’ll give it a go” It wasn’t like the judges would come round my house and laugh at me for entering… (hopefully). SO I wrote a tiny (the limit was 300 words) bit of flash comedy based on some iPhone found poetry that you might recognise… and I sent it to them. Then I forgot all about it. Until today…
Today I found out that I came second 😀 😀 😀 I can’t really believe it but it happened! Here is the link to the post where they published my writing…
and, in case you don’t want to click the link (although you should..) here is the flash comedy fiction that I wrote…
The day my phone turned into a needy surrealist and developed an obsession with otters!
When I set my phone the task of writing poetry, I never expected it to reveal a secret life full of angst, rich plotlines and otters…
I hate it when people think they know me
I have been thrown away
It does not matter
I hate it when you don’t think of me
I have just noticed the otter
It seems that there is no such thing as Tuesday
That could have been extremely depressing if it hadn’t turned suddenly, into a surrealist, near future expose on a world with otters peering at you from behind the impending destruction of Tuesday.
During that moment you can tell me how you feel
Yes it was meant for you but I am not
Soon I will be honest with the otter
It would seem that I have been lying to the otter. But what about and why? Was it about the destruction of Tuesday, which really can only be a good thing. Why would anyone lie about that? Maybe it was something else, something I was not sure that the otter could handle. Maybe I was concerned that the otter would indeed tell me how he felt…
I had to find out why I lied to the otter!
I don’t know what you are
Otters and I have gin and tonic
I am just so ready for a new wildcat
That explains it, the otter didn’t know about the new wildcat. Everyone seems to have gin and tonic though so I think the honesty went well. I am not so sure about the wildcat however…
The otter is definitely the best sort of dragon
We need a better wildcat
Don’t forget to check out the other angry bears
I think the otter should possibly lay off the gin.
Well…time and otters have stolen some days from me and I am two weeks from my last post…again 😱 but last week I promised a new schedule of Mondays and Fridays for posts on here 🙂 Mondays will be a round up of the last week and Fridays will be about something exciting exercise related 😊
So without further ado… here is the last two weeks in pictures…
some of them are awesome because I spent time in the beautiful Derbyshire dales which should make up for the lack of posts a little bit
I loved Derbyshire! So much beautiful countryside and so many hills! It was am amazing place to walk and (attempt to) run!
I promise more words in Fridays instalment 😊
Good morning people of the world!
yes I am being optimistic about my blog reach…why not!
First the new venture…
I have decided to try my h and at writing fiction 🙂 I have chosen the Otters of time to be the subjects of this fiction, they are adventurous scamps so should get up to some fantastic antics…
To see what they are up to go and have a lookhere https://otterchronicles.wordpress.com/ and folow the blog…It should be an entertaining escapade… the first installment is already up and running! And there will be new installments on Tuesday and Friday
Their first adventure is here:
THe second thing is posts to this blog, I have decided that what with keeping track of adventurous otters that blogging every day is getting somewhat hard to keep up…I am planning from next week to blog twice a week (Monday and Friday) to keep you all posted on the exercise-y goodness!
I promise an exercise update later today…for now…here is an otter…